Hidden Truths and The Meaning of Life

[Ace]

would be something interesting, if someone could poast that.

Until then, just to move some trash down closer to the dumpster:

Ace's Tuesday Truths:

1. The toilet paper goes over, not under.  It's so obvious.  I don't know why there'd ever be a debate on that; it obviously spins out better that way.

2. Women should put the dang seat up, too, if they're sensitive to others.

3. Is it ok to say to a skinny person "Hey, have you put on a few pounds?  You look good."

4. The NFL draft rewards the better teams, not the lesser ones.  It is a myth that it levels the playing field by placing the Super Bowl winner as the last pick of each round, and team with worst record first.  

5. "Exotic" is ok when applied to animal, or dancer.  Not a poaster.

6. Any poast starting with "i dont know but think i gota virus can i get free stuff somwhere can i break my computer at best buy can i get rich by poasting do virus protection workers wear masks all day your a pigeon" or words to that effect should be left alone.

7. Any poast that avoids capital letters, and punctuation, let alone saving up exclamation marks for a final flurry should be left very alone.  !!!!.

8. Guess who is one of the all-time great Canadian bands? But not Rush.  BTO is the heaviest band in rock history.  Really.  I've seen them.  I'm surprised the stage didn't collapse.

9. I read Tom Sawyer, so I don't need to hear the song.

10. The last one, since all lists end at 10.  

Ace; just moving things along.  Down.

[scuzzy]

Guess who is one of the all-time great Canadian bands? But not Rush.

I don't believe Rush Limbaugh is Canadian. Regardless, the correct answer is "Creedence Clearwater Revival".

Note: I would have used the word "iregardless" or "irregardless" for you less literate folks, but I couldn't remember the proper spelling for an improper word.

[Ace]

Maybe "nonirregardless" can come into vogue.  Or Deirregardless.  Or just "gardless."

I don't think Creedence pertains to Canada.  There aren't bayous there that I'm aware of.  Of which I'm aware.

Anne Murray performed here the other night.  Hubba hubba.

Hey; another truth.  How come people with Handicap stickers or plates also drive badly..?   And even park lousy.

And how come the vehicles with the Education special promotional plates, in support of schools, drive like complete maniacs?

I wonder if home-school teachers ever strike.  Or if folks have to set up metal detectors in their houses or hire security if they home school these days...  That'd be rough.

Ace; I tell ya, once my mind gets going it's like it takes awhile to shut off.

[pat]

I think the last time I read this much useful information was the time I got that recipe for making ice.
Really though the paper goes under not over, just read the directions on the roll.

[pliskin]

5. "Exotic" is ok when applied to animal, or dancer.  Not a poaster.


I knew there would be some slight upon my character. Just for the record, I am offended. (pat)

[trav]

ha.....ha.....ha....very funny "but not Rush"





(joking)

[Ace]

Isn't it interesting that a majority of poasters are now named "Pat."  Or "pat."  Personally, I can't stand pat.

I'm going to keep moving.  So; right along, I figure if someone poasts something with "ha....ha....ha...." or "heh" or "huh" or (joking) or :) or =) which I always thought looked sort of like an alligator or "hardeeharhar" or any of those variations, I tend to figure they aren't joking.  I mean, it seems like a ploy, and too obvious.  

But if someone takes the time to say they're offended, then they probably are.  I always say the best defense is a good offense.  Or, as the Leland Stanford Junior University Marching Band put it, "we are sorry for having offended those whom we had no intention of offending."

Also, anything that isn't "Rush" is commendable.  Good job.  Take your time; don't Rush.

Ace; now Slade was a band...

[Neon]

Forty two

[pat]

Good ole 42, I always liked that one.

Ok there 8ce, tell me what the meaning of the dream was I had last night.

[Ace]

There was no meaning to the dream you had last night. None.  Zilch.  Nada.  

I wish I could find some latent truth, hidden message, sign or portent... Really.  I do.  But can't.  It was sans meaning.  Meaningless, as it were.  

Also, you misspelled "A".  But I won't mention it, in case you got up on the wrong side of the bed after awaking from that pointless dream of yours.

Ace; if that thing caught in your Dreamcatcher, I'd dump it out...  

[pat]

Good glad there was no meaning * because * there we were sitting at Hacienda. I was buy you all the margaritas you could handle.
Phew,I'll just pretend it never happened.

[44mayg]

Slade..... Slayed? Heh! There's a group nobody heard of, cept probably Ace. I think maybe I did too, still do.

1972

How D'You Ride
The Whole Worlds Goin' Crazee
Look at Last Nite
I Won't Let it 'Appen Agen
Move Over

Gudbuy T' Jane
Gudbuy Gudbuy
Mama Weer All Crazee Now
I Don' Mind
Let the Good Times Roll

Ace, I still don't know how you got an iron version of Ozzie. You probably got the iron version of Slade too, huh?

I only gots the vinyl Slade. Probabaly the closest I can come to anything iron is BTO 'Ironhorse', but don't let the name fool yuh, it's vinyl too.

[Ace]

Don't let anyone tell you the English can't spell...  
Or Americans.

They can.  Usually, like me, they just might not choose to.

Noddy Holder was unmatched as a lead singer.  Except for Janis Joplin.  In looks, it was pretty much a tie.

And Dave Hill.. nobody has had bangs like that, before or since.  N'body.  B'fore, r since.  If I had to choose between British or American rock, I usually side with British.  Unless it's Ozzy.  Or Canadian.  
I only own one Ozzy record; that was the live one with Randy Rhodes (it was a gift my wife got).  I've got several covers of Sabbath tunes, but nothing direct.  Found them ok, but really not a fan of his voice.  Even if he is an Iron Man.

Better than a tin man, anyway.  Or Tin Machine, for that matter.  I mean, I love Bowie but that stuff could hurt your ears... as much as Geddy Lee, except they were playing and not singing.
8ce; Pat is still dreaming if he thinks he bought me anything.  Or would.  Geez Louise.  In my dreams...

[scuzzy]

Hey, you misspelled "A".

[Ace]

I missed "A" what?  *what*?  What??????

Better not have been another typo.  Criminy, my keyboard is loaded with those things.  Stupid Qwerty device.

I've got 2 Slade CDs.  Criminy, I don't do vinyl anymore.  Finally disconnected the turntable.  I can't stand the hiss and pops...  I'm spoiled.  

Huh. I wondered what that smell was.  Shoot.

Ace; or Aceio or 8ce or aCe or AC or whatever way you slice it, it's butchered.

[44mayg]

Hey, there ain't nothing wrong with an occasional vinyl!! It's kinda like a blast from the past, and the younger people who've never even seen one actually wonder how it works.

Heck, I even bust out a little vinyl about once a year just for the heck of it.

There's a guy who optically scanned the grooves of an album, and was able to create the original sound. Although the process isn't near perfect, there are some samples for you to listen to. I came across this a few weeks ago and found it interesting because of the theory and how it actually does work, even if it sounds like Ace's old records.

Digital Needle - A Virtual Gramophone

And the toilet paper DOES go over the top, not under!!!!

[Bubba]

I thought toilet paper went "on the bottom" then "goes" to the septic tank, or does it come to the septic tank, I guess it depends on where you are when you see it, Yuck,,,,, where is Scuzzy ?  Time to "wipe" out this poast,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

[Ace]

Geez Louise, Bubba, here's a virtual truth with hidden meaning: It's not Winter any more.  At least not in Indiana.  

I can't believe we're ahead of Illinoisians in any regard, so I figure you just didn't change your calendar yet.  

Oh; lest I forget:

LOOKOUT!!! LOOKOUT!!!! MAYDAY! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!!!  !! .

There; didn't want to neglect my other duties.  Been pretty busy with the jesting thing and the janitorial 2nd job this week.

The last records I bought, over the final couple years, were taped immediately so as to preserve them.  So they're probably in good shape.  If I hooked up the turntable, I could tell.  I've been replacing the ones I wore out when younger, anyway.  This week I got Odessa by the BeeGees, Layla, and Johnny Winter And Live.  And.  Live.  andliveandliveandlive stop it endive.

I agree with 44Mage on the TP; I don't think I could do walk it out to a septic tank like Bubba said to.  

AC; don't bring Scuzzy into this.  He'd probably shoot anyone who'd TP his house.

[44mayg]

Ace, you're gonna screw up them LP's! I ain't never heard anything so stupid. Buy BRAND NEW old re-releases, then tape them.

I hope you didn't use duct tape. At least with the clear stuff, you can still see what's inside.

Scuzzy won't touch the TP thing. I bet there ain't none in his house, or even on the outside. Cat's have boxes, you know. Filled with, get this........... DIRT! (Does the dirt go on the inside or outside?)