Global Unwarming

[scuzzy]

Oh, lucky me. Ace likes me. Lucky, lucky, me. Sigh.

After what you did to your neighbor's yard, I don't want to know what you did with those glasses.

Scuzzy; Are you sure that's lemonade?

[pat]

So you watch the glasses so you don�t spill the drink? Good idea.

And, I really don�t care who likes me or not. I mean, I�m not out to make enemies but I�m not a suck-up either. Lemons do make me pucker though.

[Ace]

I "watch my glasses"... what in the world is wrong with me...

Well, I guess I do.  I mean, I'm wearing them.  So I guess I have to watch them. 

Yes, it's lemonade.  Criminy, it says so on the dang can.  I believe you get what you pay for.  I'm not out to make any enemies, either.  Shoot, they could be armed.  And loaded.  It doesn't take that many of these margaritas to do that...

My margaritas do not suck, though.  They're aight. 

Ace; I spill enough, as is.  But never the beans.

[pat]

I think it's time for a new pair of glasses for me. I have that kind that gets dark as it get light, but they just don't get light again, fast enough, once you come in from the light. Kind of makes it hard to see in the darker.

So why does one say "pair of glasses" anyway? It is just one unit with two lenses. From now on I'm just going to put on my glass and go.

Lemonade is all right with me. Like they say. When life hands you a lemon..........

[Bill]

And these days, it's probably even more accurate to say "a pair of plastics."
Dang things are expensive enough, as it is.

Bill

[pat]

You got that right, especially when you pick out a unit that you find out doesn�t perform as they should and the eyeglass company doesn�t exactly stand behind the product. I picked out some last year that ended up having sort of a curve to the lens, which was fine if all you do is look straight ahead. However using peripheral vision gave a somewhat optical distortion point of view, almost like looking through a fish eye lens. What a trip that was until I replaced them.

[Ace]

No way am I going to hold up a fish and try to look through it.  Not even if it's fresh.

I have photosun lifechanging lightchanging lenses too.  Actually walked into work and a coworker looked at me and asked "Why are your lenses dark..?"  I was going to respond "Why are you..." but thought better of it.  I'd color her Maroon.

i go to a private practice down the road, so they're good about fixing stuff.  I never went to one of the chain operations for eyewear.  I suppose with global warming they'll turn darker more oftener.  Right now it's 34 degrees out in the balmy climes of Sunny Michiana.

Ace; any warmer and I'm gonna have to get my leather jacket back out.

[Bill]

Major milestone here, Ace, O prolific one, hits 5700 poasts.

I still use separate sunglasses, progressive lens, and polarized.  So now I carry three pairs, the regular progressives, the sunglasses. and a pair just for working on the computer.  Geez.

Bill

[Ace]

Thank you for the recognition and accompanying award, which I expect to arrive soon.  Quantity over Quality.

I've got those progressive lenses, too.  And the newer ones are improved on the computer use, with my newest trifocalized configuration.  You know, I bet if you put on all three of those pairs (6) at once you'd see right through stuff.  I hope you don't see through me, though.

Ace; I do more, than anybody, here.

[scuzzy]

Oh geez. Now I'm gonna have to bump up his title to "xTremely Super-xTreme Sooper-Dooper Mother of all Fools and Then Some".

Scuzzy; Or maybe not.

[Ace]

Yes, you do.  Although the pooper scooper nomenclature isn't entirely necessary..  The Earth may be cooling, but I'm just warming up.

Ace; Mother Earth, Mother of All Fools...  I'm the Mother Load.

[scuzzy]

All right, already. Geez. You and your squeaky wheel are now officially promoted to the rank of Super Duper Jester.

I'd show you a mother load, but then I'd have to ban myself from the forum.

Scuzzy; Use your powers wisely; not to make lemonade.

[Ace]

Of all the people to criticize someone's use of their power supply...  I made lemonade yesterday, so I'm good right now.

I sorta like the "Super Duper" designation, just because it makes me feel like puttin' on the Ritz.

Ace; I'll try some cheese on one, too.

[scuzzy]

Putting on the Ritz makes me think of Gary Cooper cuttin' the cheese.

For my next trick I'll promote you to the rank of Amazing Rhythm Ace, since you remind me so much of Kelvin Holly. Actually, you don't.

Maybe I'll do it in honor of the now defunct JA. You know, I like that word... defunct, defunct, defunct... cool.

Scuzzy; Third rate romance; low rent rendezvous.

[Ace]

Why'd you de-funk Johnny?  Criminy, we need all the funk we can muster.

That'd be a new one: Funk Meister Muster Mir. Mustard Ace.  That sounds like Regina Spektor getting stuck on a syllable, again. 

Ace; I oughta email her that Scuzzy is stalking her.

[scuzzy]

I didn't do anything to JA. He just stopped coming aroung. It must have been something you said. Maybe he switched to dial-up, which means he should be here any day now.

Regina already has several restraining orders in place against me.

Scuzzy; She's just playing hard to get.

[Ace]

Usually it's Easter when I stop coming aroung...  Aroungggg.  RNGghh. 

That's how a Pirate would say it.  Or an Indy car.

Well, I think the last thing he said was how nice it was that we get along so well.  That would make it your fault, since you have such animosity toward me while I'm intolerant toward you.  I'm on Regina's side, on this. 

Ace; Osama Obama Bin Laden is playing hard to get.

[scuzzy]

Dang it. I'm getting fed up with this global warming. It's snowing again on the north end of Colorado Springs. This is getting really old. Sort of like Ace, but not quite as much.

And what's wrong with the way I typo around? Hug? Huh?

I noticed that the more I drink, the more these keys move around on the keyboard.

Scuzzy; Where the h*ck is my snow shovel? I know it's aroung here someplace.

[Ace]

What a stupid place to live.  You're like that redheaded snowboarder kid skimming the globe looking for the next snowstorm.  I try to run screaming from snow every chance I get.

It's globally warmed in Michiana to the upper 80's every day.  What do you guys do if the springs freeze?  I'd mail you a snow shovel, along with an extra cooling fan, for a nominal fee and a couple $41 stamps.

I guess instead of water parks you run ice sculptures for Memorial day.  Either way, you get a water slide.

Ace; CO Springs hasn't sprung yet.