Author Topic: Make The English Language Dance  (Read 21046 times)

Offline Bill

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #180 on: Aug 14, 2008, 03:15 AM »
Hey, 2 against 1 isn't fair.  But that's great, let's make it 3 against 1. 

Acer, loosen up your joints(yes, I know it's hard at our age) put your fingers on the keys and get back to work boy!

B-

LInS & JimS - BTW I smiled at both your offerings, just don't have the jester juice to respond appropriately.
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Offline scuzzy

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #181 on: Aug 14, 2008, 11:08 AM »
Let's go for 4.

I have no desire to wear Ace's shoes. To begin with, they are wayyyyyy too big. And they curl up at the toes. Then there's the smell. I imagine the hat isn't any better.

Hey, here's one: Cross Ace with a monk and you get a monkace. With an orange and get an orangutace. With chips and get a chimpanzace. With a go-go dancer and get a gorillace. With primer paint and get a primace.

Scuzzy; with gas and you get a fartace of what's to come.
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Offline LinS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #182 on: Aug 15, 2008, 05:47 AM »
If I/we poast again, does the count go up to 5 to 1?

Ace,
This is the Place
For a Michiana musing
We'd hate to be losing
Please don your jester bonnet
And respond to this sonnet
Give us a thrill
And pick up your quill
To pen an answer
From the pointy-toed word dancer
 
LinS; Are you enjoying the Verbalympics?

Offline Ace

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #183 on: Aug 15, 2008, 06:12 AM »
No; I've stopped using English as well as pens, unless I'm writing a check.  I mouse around, and keyboard mostly.

You guys are something... you insult someone's feet/footware, cap, choice of drink and place of origin, and then you ask for inspiration and entertainment.  Criminy.

Look, I think somebody oughta answer Johnny's limey question and Pat's Batman review, frankly.  Go to the Poast office and write them.  I did enjoy the dog names, French slurs and Scuzzy referring to me as fartface.  Otherwise, I really don't have anything brilliant at this time on a Friday.  Let alone thrilling. 

Ace; I'd rather have Nounalympics.
Ring bells for service.

Offline LinS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #184 on: Aug 15, 2008, 08:25 AM »
Welcome back Ace!!! You made it back in time for Day 1 of the Nounalympics...

On the schedule for today:

Synchronized verbal sparring
Uneven alliteration bars
Sinking or swimming
Jester barb throw
Pointy shoe curling

Any ideas for tomorrow's events?

LinS; Going for the gold.

Offline Ace

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #185 on: Aug 18, 2008, 04:42 AM »
Well, this is getting entirely too competitive.  Why can't there just be a quad-annual gathering of sportsmanship and goodwill or even St. Vincent DePaul and mutual humanity and brotherhood among women.  Instead of this paramilitary training of hand picked youngsters into brutal training and chauvinistic blind obedience to blonde jokes.

I do think they should move all the events to the beach, even if they don't have their own sand.  Shoot, you can always buy sand.  Pole vaulting, as long as their country isn't under nuclear attack due to having missiles.  100 meter sprints.  Gymnastic events.  Diving.  And I think bikinis are perfectly appropriate sporting garb; it boosts viewership and sells more Coke.  It's funny that swimmers are wearing more clothing while others aren't. 

I for one am not going to attempt the Poasters record of 8 consecutive golden haired jokes; I found the best way to not lose is to not compete.  I would quit before it started, and throw my medal in distaste off the poadium. 

Ace; and still they make fun of my shoes.
Ring bells for service.

Offline LinS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #186 on: Aug 18, 2008, 12:28 PM »
I'm with you Ace with regard to the blonde, er, blind allegiance to the fair-haired joke competition. I much prefer verbal gymnastics. Or a good old-fashioned synonym sprint. Or a metaphor marathon.

LinS; Off to the rACEs.

Offline Ace

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #187 on: Aug 19, 2008, 06:56 AM »
LinS and I tied.  Meaning, I won. 
The judges threw out the high and low scores, and then more of hers, and inflated mine.  So, fair and square per the poast-Olympic stress syndrome, I won.

I shall now be a sore winner and toss one of these stupid jester hat thingys over in the left side links. And await a blonde joke, involving a trampoline.  Perhaps a poast medley relay.  As long as I can lipsync, with someone better looking on stage. 

Ace; if we do any equestrian events Scuzzy can be the south end of a horse facing north.
Ring bells for service.

Offline JimS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #188 on: Jan 27, 2009, 10:29 AM »
Time to resurrect this puppy...


The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.  He acquired his size from too much pi.

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.

She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

Two silk worms had a race.  They ended up in a tie.

Time flies like an arrow.  Fruit flies like a banana.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.  The police are looking into it.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.  One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a-head.'

I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.  Then it hit me.

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.  When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

A backward poet writes in-verse.

In democracy it's your vote that counts.  In feudalism it's your count that votes.

When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

Don't join dangerous cults, practice safe sects!
"I shall pass through this world but once.  Any good I can do, or any kindness that I can show any human being, let me do it now and not defer it, for I shall not pass this way again."
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Offline JimS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #189 on: Feb 05, 2009, 11:05 AM »
"You can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead"

Am I going to have to restart those BUMP thingies again?  C'mon, Ace.  Criminey, dangit, and what ever else you (used to) say. 

GET BACK IN HERE!!!

Now don't make me have to yell like that again...
"I shall pass through this world but once.  Any good I can do, or any kindness that I can show any human being, let me do it now and not defer it, for I shall not pass this way again."
 - Stephen Grellet

Offline LinS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #190 on: Feb 05, 2009, 11:17 AM »
Hello all!

Hope everyone is staying warm...but remember,

Many are cold, but few are frozen.

LinS; Don't give me the cold shoulder...

Offline Ace

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #191 on: Feb 07, 2009, 08:18 AM »
Was there a question in there?

As Tweety Bird said: "I thought I thaw a thaw today."  We're near 50 degrees and it's only 11:15 Michiana time.  This is the first morning that hasn't started sub-10 degrees in a month.  I'm hoping to see a Robin in the next few days.  Probably with his frozen little toes stuck in the permafrost...

I enjoyed the String of Hits by the JimS.  I stole them and sent them to other people.  Please Send More. 

Ace; thankyou
Ring bells for service.

Offline LinS

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Re: Make The English Language Dance
« Reply #192 on: Jan 08, 2010, 10:57 AM »
Hello all,

Re-connected with a college friend of mine via Facebook recently. Found out his daughter is a pun lunatic, or punatic for short, so I sent him the link for this forum, and had so much fun reading some of these old poasts, I had to drop in and say hello and maybe eke a few new puns out of this tired brain.

LinS; Looking forward to getting back in touch