Author Topic: ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy  (Read 2715 times)

Offline Ace

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ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« on: Aug 02, 2004, 05:18 AM »
Sometimes you think he'll never leave.  

* After being infested with worms, Ace's pc is found fairly alive and well with just the daily DSO exploit 5-pack appearing.  Next time he gets bored and decides he wants to fiddle with his BIOS settings and enable his desktop to disappear and have to repair and then reinstall the dang OS (isn't that that show on the WB..?) and then have all heck break loose maybe he just oughta install the early bird, first.

* A multitude of Poaster's Children help Ace become functional again, which is even more difficult than you'd think.

* Travis and Ludd step up to the drive through window to take care of the Funny Room in the janitor's absence, filling the time with poasts such as "Where's Ace?" and "Did Ace Disappear?" and "Is Ace Gone, and Why Not?" and "Is He Coming Back? Why?" and such.  Trav remains Jester In Waiting, since we still are.

* Multiple JimS allow Humour To Reign by poasting a fine Blonde Joke after the merits of such are discussed at length, with the conclusion that Shaun and Wade's hair is much deserved.  

* A motion is made to ban at least one or 3 of the JimS for insulting an ethnic group. those being fair haired peoples, and so endangering wandering children or someone's sense of moral outrage.  A plea bargain is accepted and a sentence of probation with ok behavior enacted when it is pointed out that it's ok to make fun of blond(e) people since they can't tell, anyway.

* A vote of no confidence passes concerning Pandas not doing enough to achieve extinction fast enough.

* The Chicago Cubs pick up an All-Star Boston Red Sox shortstop, making fans wonder "how cursed can things get when you combine them..."

* Local Constable Scuzzy becomes The Reanimator by bringing his own dead poast back to life.  

* Travis brings back his original visage, bulb intact, as well as his habit of putting the entire previous poast in quotes within his own, recreating deja vu all over again.  It's about as redundant as signing your poast at the end, when it's dang obvious it's you who poasted it... Geez Louise Louise.

* Karen poasts a photo of Sting, whom Travis places in Cars and tries to run out of music business.  I guess that means Ric Ocasek was the good looking singer in the Police.

* That was the first recorded attempt in history to put "good looking" in the same sentence as "Ric Ocasek."  It won't happen again.

* Room Jester Ace heaves a sigh of resignation, having lived through the 80's and missing the last vestiges of Pop music.  Phonetically, that's spelled "Heaaauughggh."

* Trend Micro is found to drag down the Poaster's page, as much as its firewall stood idly by waving its hands while Sissy the Sassy Sasser and BoBo the Bobax Creep and Spunky the Spybot Worm infiltrated the holes in it and every part of Windows as well as Outlook and Explorer and the Vent At the Back Of Ace's Monarch last week.  

* Ace's return spurs viewership to new highs, as he reads his own poast.  

* After I get some more coffee.  Then I will.


Ace; he signed.

« Last Edit: Aug 02, 2004, 05:19 AM by Ace »
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Offline pat

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #1 on: Aug 02, 2004, 02:21 PM »
I guess I just wondered what it was that Ace was missing?
Oh and sorry about the Trend Micro thing, I can?t figure that one out.

Must have been pretty busy in here today for this topic to have been read over 400 times.

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Offline scuzzy

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #2 on: Aug 02, 2004, 03:05 PM »
Why anyone would want to read this over 400 times is beyond me. I might have to delete this thread just to ensure no more minds are wasted on it.

Geez - good thing we have a massive monthly access allowance with our host.
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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #3 on: Aug 02, 2004, 04:39 PM »
It just goes to show my popularity, as people are lining up at their monitors to hear "The Latest From Ace."

Ha!

Heh.

Hmm...

Or it's some glitch with the accounting dept., here.  I guess that's not out of the question.  
 
Ok; if it goes over a Thousand or a Billion Hits by Tomorrow Morning, Then it's obvious that the Entire Web Is Tuning In To Find Out What I'm Missing!  Actually, turns out to be a lot.  I bet Google has a bunch of links, just based on "Who Missed Ace?" or "Ace=doofus" or "Who Cares?  Ace."  Or "Stinking pandas stink." or "Problem; what's Ace's?(match part or all of phrase).

Oh, Pat; don't fret the Trend Micro thing.  It at least allowed me to clean things out, until the Norton took.  It was weird; the warning pop up kept flashing "You're Under Attack from _________" and I thought it meant it was catching stuff, incoming.  Not that "We're Not Doing Squat, You Better Lock This Puppy Down Pronto" reality.  I guess that's how you learn.

Ace; me=hard way

p.s. My dang finger is starting to hurt from clicking the dang button 400 times on this stupid poast, too...
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Offline Bill

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #4 on: Aug 02, 2004, 08:09 PM »
If you took the spurs off, viewers probably wouldn't hit new highs or heights.  Besides, Texans wear spurs not Indians or Michianaians.  

Crikey, you seem to kick up trouble even when you're (you are) not here.  Or missing (something).

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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #5 on: Aug 04, 2004, 06:12 AM »
Okay; I'm ready to make another go of it, here.  This poast oughta hit 5 figures today, I would think.  It'll be huge... huge; I tell ya.

Could probably call it "Poast About Nothing; Part Three."  

Well.  7 or 8, then.

Nikes with spurs... I think that'd sell.  I'd just scratch up the linoleum, but that's ok since I've gotta lay tile over it eventually anyway.  I could jingle jangle jingle plus shoot up sparks on the concrete.  That, along with being festooned with Jester accoutrements, would be sporty.

ACe; buffooned.
« Last Edit: Aug 04, 2004, 06:13 AM by Ace »
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Offline scuzzy

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #6 on: Aug 04, 2004, 10:46 AM »
I don't understand why anyone would be interested in Ace's back. I suppose it's really hairy, but I don't find that interesting. Kinda gross, but not interesting.

Scuzzy; I once left but was never gone. Came back, but never returned.
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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #7 on: Aug 04, 2004, 06:41 PM »
You were blind; but now,

are deaf.

Geez Louise.  You came back.  You clown.

We both did.  Sometimes I wonder why.  Now now, but sometimes.

Ace; it's not that dang hairy, dangit.  I mow it, periodically.
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Offline Bill

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #8 on: Aug 05, 2004, 06:42 AM »
"...and turn yourself around..." that way we wouldn't have to worry about your back or being back or left (out).  

Besides, you're right, always right, well, maybe not always but never wrong and certainly not left.

Anyone that finds blond(e) jokes funny can't be left.
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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #9 on: Aug 05, 2004, 04:34 PM »
Aw, Ludd.  It's nice of you to say, but I'm just a nobody.

And nobody's perfect.

Hey...

How about that?!  Cool.

ACe; I wonder where I left off.
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Offline Bill

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! crikey
« Reply #10 on: Aug 05, 2004, 08:19 PM »
Bet you been saving that just waiting to find an opportunity to use it -nobody, indeed.

Course, far as Poasters is concerned you ain't got nobody  no body - no, hairy or otherwise, back, no feet, no curled up toes, nothing.  Just a name, a fine name at that, but just a name and a couple of freaky stars, one of which is burned out.

But your right, not left.  No body is perfect.   :P
Or to quote Trav: " :P :P :P :P :P :P :P :P "
« Last Edit: Aug 05, 2004, 08:28 PM by luddite »
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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #11 on: Aug 06, 2004, 05:31 AM »
Criminy, don't quote Trav.  Or he'll wind up quoting your whole poast just to add an "Aight!" at the end, for punctuation.

And the other thing. ::)

"Ace" is aight, I guess.  It's not hard to spell, at least.  It's better than being named after your cat, like "Scuzzy" or "Karen."  Or to go with your real name, like "Neon."  I probably woulda used "pat" but it was already taken.

"Buddy" was ok for awhile, but he died.  

Bob; I was thinking of naming myself after my house, like Igloo did.  But TriLevel just seemed too involved.
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Offline Bill

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #12 on: Aug 06, 2004, 06:49 AM »
Criminy, don't quote Trav.  Or he'll wind up quoting your whole poast just to add an "Aight!" at the end, for punctuation.

And the other thing. ::)

"Ace" is aight, I guess.  It's not hard to spell, at least.  It's better than being named after your cat, like "Scuzzy" or "Karen."  Or to go with your real name, like "Neon."  I probably woulda used "pat" but it was already taken.

"Buddy" was ok for awhile, but he died.  

Bob; I was thinking of naming myself after my house, like Igloo did.  But TriLevel just seemed too involved.

You mean like this?

 :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

Aight!!
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Offline Igloo

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #13 on: Aug 06, 2004, 12:55 PM »
hey just cause i am cooler than yo! ;)  :P :P :P :P :P :P :P
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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #14 on: Aug 06, 2004, 02:24 PM »
Oh; would you two knock it off.  You don't need to encourage him.

I think we need to enact the chatroom rule of "poasting without saying anything whilst abusing the smiley emoticons shall be deemed sufficient reason to ban one, for all perpetuity."  

I think the more one doesn't say anything, the longer the sentence.

Ace; I've found some of my sentences wander off for quite awhile; that's why I use a lot of semicolons to haul them back.
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Offline iansl

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #15 on: Aug 06, 2004, 02:44 PM »
hey just cause i am cooler than yo! ;)
According to my limited knowledge of Spanish, yo means me, myself, I, something like that.

That would mean that you would be saying...

Quote
Just cause I'm cooler than myself!

Huh...wierd...

And I agree; smileys were made for use as expression marks; you would only use many of them if you have a big point to get across, a super strong emotion to convey, or a cheesy popup to promote (which I'd've blocked with trusty ole Firefox). As such, smileys (or smilies, howevuh ya spellit) should be used piecemail or maybe two at a time...or remotely even 3 at a time..or large versions maybe, but not five, ten, fifteen at a time...

Maybe we should have options for 32x32pixel versions of the following smilies for Travis' benefit:

 :) ;) :D ;D :( :o 8) ::) :P

Keep in mind the above smilies were used only for educational purposes, and that not as a 'poast as I poast' type of thing, unless you want to quote this and say 'Aight, that was great' or 'Great; I agree' but in doing so lengthen the thing out to where you may need to reel it back in with semicolons, use different sentances, and such. But no quotes with more than three smilies in a row below it and practically nothing else of anything! :)
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Offline Bill

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #16 on: Aug 06, 2004, 08:32 PM »
 Are you suggesting that we shouldn't do this:
 :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)-

But this would be OK?
 :) :);   :) :);   :) :);   :) :).
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Offline iansl

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #17 on: Aug 07, 2004, 05:23 AM »
It's better, as you turned down the smilies a little bit, but not as good as a sentance with only one or two smilies in the whole thing, plus several words that mean something. :)
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Offline Ace

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Re:ACE IS BACK! AGAIN! criminy
« Reply #18 on: Aug 07, 2004, 09:09 PM »
Well, cheese Criminy.  I would hope I'm cooler than myself.  I mean, who isn't, you know.

I would rather refrain from using Smilees as punctuation, since I'd just as soon use punctuation as punctuation.  Not an overabundance of punctuation.  As in !!!!!! or ,,,,,.  Just the nominal portion.

As far as using words that mean something, I think I'll try to incorporate a few every poast.  Maybe go with something like "fiduciary" or "blather."

Those are good ones; chock full of meaning, too.

Ace; Maybe "explicit", used in a joke.  Or even "porcine."
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