INTERVIEW WITH THE JESTER

[Buffalo2102]

If you want to change your PC to look like a MAC, this should help http://features.engadget.com/entry/8828351836181248/

[Ace]

Great.  Next there'll be a "How to make your Whopper resemble a Big Mac."

I wish I could add a computer enhancement that would cause me to know what I'm doing.

Hey; I bet it's in the Bios, somewhere.  Yeah.

ace; let's reboot this puppy right now

[Buffalo2102]

"How to make your Whopper resemble a Big Mac."

Melt cheese on it and put it in a bun?

OOOOer :o

[Ace]

And, once again

BUFFALO STEPS UP WHERE NO MAN WOULD STEP

Thank you.  It's been great knowing you, and you will be missed.  And you forgot the dang special sauce.  

Ace; and they wonder how the buffalo almost became extinct.  

[pat]

It was bullets.

[Whizbang]

It was bullets.

Huh?  I just thought Mickey "D" clipped all of their wings and they couldn't fly anymore.   :P

[pat]

Bull flies not buffalo.

[Ace]

Bull flies, and is cleared for landing;

you are cleared for runway 1-7 9er.

Niner.
Niner niner.

Ace; niner.  I like buffalo wings with chicken lips.

[Bill]

I think ten and then eleven are next.  Sounds like you need to clean your laser, and then reboot.

[Buffalo2102]

And, once again

BUFFALO STEPS UP WHERE NO MAN WOULD STEP

Thank you.  It's been great knowing you, and you will be missed.  And you forgot the dang special sauce.  

Ace; and they wonder how the buffalo almost became extinct.  

Well, I'm still here....so far, so good.

Sorry about the innuendo (Criminy (Crimmy), we could have some fun with that too couldn't we?).

If I do go, will I be missed?  And if so, will that be worthy of an ode (eau'd).

[Ace]

Geez Louise, that's a rabid looking hamster...

Anyway, heck yes, you'd be missed!  Criminy, we miss everybody who's no longer here to take abuse face-first.  You've left your mark on this place Buffalo, like a ...

Well, like a Buffalo would on a prairie.  

We'd probably be able to put together quite a going-away party for you.  Not like mine typically is, but I'm special that way.  Not any other way, particularly, but that way.  I usually get the "here's your hat what's your hurry" farewell.  And haikus; I tell ya, I do accrue haikus on my way out the door.  I'll always appreciate that.  Those.  Them.  I suppose, more in line with your contributions, we could assemble some dirty limericks in your honor.  Honour.  Your Honor.

If you'd just as soon stick around, that be even sweller.  With both you and Jims in the room, I can just take off for the rest of the day.  

Ace; works for me.  Thanks for filling in.

[Buffalo2102]

Like the avatar eh?  Not bad for my first one, if I do say so myself.

Mmmmm.......dirty limericks, sounds good.  I may have to go away and come back again.  Just to see.  There again, I've told you now so you wouldn't believe me if I said that I was going.  And you wouldn't do anything for me.  Even if I really did go now, you still wouldn't believe it and wouldn't do anything.  And if I went and didn't come back, how would I know if you did do anything?
So, in order to know if you had a party or whatever, I would have to be here.  Therefore, I think I'll stay.  But then I won't get a party.....

It's late.....I think I'll try and get some sleep.

I'm going now (but I'm coming back).

[trav]

I have NO idea what you guys are talking about!  :-\

[Ace]

Well, that's a first.

Buff; pretend to leave and I'll pretend to poast a limerick.  Probably have "Nantucket" in there, somewhere.  Or Norfolk; I was there once.

Ace; the end of the world will be signalled by Trav understanding what we're talking about.  ::)

[iansl]

Probably, and that squirrel looks really wierd and looked wierder at first. Took me a full thirty seconds to figure out just what was going on.

Ludd, take over with odes to buffalo

[Bill]

Buff, if you wait a day or so it will be Trav's perpetual birthday again and you can join the party!  Kinda have your cake but only look at it.

Never mind Norfolk, how about Bloomington or  Saginaw?  Garden spots worthy of poetry.

[Buffalo2102]

Probably, and that squirrel looks really wierd and looked wierder at first. Took me a full thirty seconds to figure out just what was going on.

Squirrel? That's no squirrel.  This is a squirrel.

It's a hamster.  A karate hamster.  So watch it.

What is going on anyway?  Since you've figured it out, be kind and tell Trav (and me!).
It could be a sort of present for his perpetual birthday. :) :D ;D 8)


LIMERICK
There once was a jester called ACE
Who poasted 'til blue in the face
about pandas dead
or monkeys instead
stinking all over the place

[Ace]

Ok, that was pretty darn good.  Pretty darn.  I was just thinking, though, that the antecedent of "stinking" isn't exactly clear.  I mean, if the pandas are stinking, or the monkeys are stinking.  If the pandas are dead they don't stink as much as when they're alive, so

hold it.  Hold on just a minute.

Hmm.  Wait... dang.

Or me stinking.  Dangit.

Ok, that might not be as darn good as originally thought. Dang.

Also, our squirrels are twice the size of that squirrel.  Just their mighty arms and big furry pants alone.  And they're brown, here.  A medium to light brown.  And big.  Boy, these things are so packed with peanuts they're huge.

Ace; so the hamster isn't a squirrel?  Huh.  Karate Kid's Hamster II.

[Igloo]

SQUIRREL!!!!!!!!!!!!!  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D





"i like squirrels, they are nice to pet" Lennie - Of mice and Men

:-\

[Ace]

Yelling "Squirrel" isn't a good way to make friends and influence people, in my opinion.

Well, actually, I guess that could influence people, if they're thinking they have one on their head and you're trying to alert them or scare it away.

Actually, if you yelled "Squirrel" at me I'd probably be scared away.

So; Lenny is goin' for the squirrel ranch instead of rabbits, huh.  I guess it's the same difference.  With his love of soft furry things he coulda trained hamsters in martial arts.  Karate means "open furry paw."

Ace; George probably woulda shot him for yelling.

[Bill]

 A karate hamster? Nah,  looks more like a Badger punter.

[Igloo]

i think its a really sad play at the end, when he shoots him :( i like the bit about the multicoulred rabbits, green, blue, yellow....

[Ace]

Ok; look.  Enough Steinbeck.  Let's get back to the subject of this interview.

Me.

Do I like multi-hued rabbits?  No, I don't, especially.  Do I think rabbits make swell pets?  No.  If an animal makes no sound, it is not satisfactory as a pet.  Squirrels, rabbits and pandas do not qualify as pets.

Do I remember "The Grapes of Mud" parody?  Sure.  And the Warner Brothers parody?  You bet.

Did Lenny get it in the end?  No, I think he got it in the head, if I read that right.

Ace; tell me about the rabbits, George.

[Bill]

The white rabbit was late, and then he died.
Alice was eating mushrooms, so she didn't care but the Ace of Hearts was worried.


So then what?

[Buffalo2102]

Interview question:  Is Ace the only name you use on the internet?

I think Ace is also known as awkm - see the first comment on this page
http://www.gothamist.com/archives/jen/011447.php

[Ace]

What kind of stinking trick was that?!,,!  Winding up looking at the south end of a panda facing north, with some Asian lady standing alongside singing the praises of the vermin furballs.

Criminy.

Anyway, I use a lot of names on the internet.. Shoot, just here alone I've been Ace, Buddy, Satan Claus, Bob, Aceio, DbuMB PAOsrs, whatever the elf's name was, Donner...  Besides the stuff Scuzzy calls me, like dork.

Ace; ask me about how many personalities I have...

[Bill]

OK, Ace, Buddy, Satan Claus, Bob, Aceio, DbuMB PAOsrs, whatever the elf's name was, Donner...  Besides the stuff Scuzzy calls me, like dork.

How many personalities DO you have?
You also forgot Sybil and Eve.  

[Ace]

Just one bad one.

Oh, and I forgot Notredamus.  The Prophet.  Dang, that's a key one.

Ace; typically.

[iansl]

Of course that's not a squirrel, and of course that's a squirrel, and of course what wasn't a squirrel is maybe a hedgehog until I am told that it isn't.

Ace got more names, I see, and Igloo has made SQUIRREL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the replacement for LOOKOUT!. Looks like you have a changed job description on your hands, Ace. No, you can't walk out. You're saying the same thing, and so am I: bye for the moment.

[Ace]

The Hedgehog was our corporate symbol for some time.. it is a creature that is expertly capable of doing one thing exceedingly well.

This, by the same people who brought you "Your Mission Statement."  

Hedgehog it is.  With a gas mask.  A nice touch.

Look; you can SQUIRREL!!! all you want.  After the initial tries at crying wolf, eventually people will see the ruse for what it is.

Ok, Squirrel.  Not wolf.  Same thing.  Well, sorta the same.

Heh.  I'm thinking of the fable "The 3 pigs and the Big Bad Squirrel."  That'd be a treat.

Ooh; Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Squirrel.  

Oh; here's another.  Weresquirrels.  They only come out in a full nut.

Geez, I crack myself up sometimes.  I'm glad Iansl's here to help.  And Ludd, to point out my foibles.

Ace; A Foible is a story with a moral...