Arkansas Boasts New Tournament

[Whizbang]

Just to show you that we here in "Sticksville" are on the cutting edge of new developments, Hot Springs will host the regional championship for the Rock, Paper, Scissors tournament in March 2007.  The national championship will be in Las Vegas, Nevada (where else?).  Rumors are that the contestants are preparing for this grueling event by rubbing the fuzz off peaches with their thumbs.  This may sprout yet another potential tournament of the obvious.

[Ace]

I'd still go with "Rock", because a rock will tear right through the dang paper...

I remember reading the rules and tricks of the trade with that game years ago, when Quantexes ruled the world.  There's quite a psychology to it, for the elite players.  Plus, it's possible to delay one's throw and basically quickly react to the opponent if it's not timed exactly and you know what to watch for.  I think there's actually a combo name for it like "Roscissper" or something weird like that.  When kids played it in Jr. High the winner would get to slap the losers inside forearm with two fingers... to the point of redness and great pain, in a rout.

I oughta go for my birthday.  Maybe I could practice up, or learn to cheat.  I wouldn't care to qualify for the Las Vegas part, though.  It seems like a tacky place to visit, and I don't have any money to lose.

Ace; plus a lot of violent deaths, according to CSI.

[pat]

Huh, at least up here in Michigan we have a real contest that takes real talent. I can only be talking about the International Cherry Pit Spitting Contest.

Not that there?s anything wrong with rocks and papers and scissors. I surely don?t want to start an interstate flame war here, but what can be more exciting than a good old fashion cherry pit spit?

[Buffalo2102]

.....what can be more exciting than a good old fashion cherry pit spit?

How about a cheese roll?

http://www.cheese-rolling.co.uk/the_event.htm

We have the annual International Cheese Rolling competition here.

Buff; It's very gouda.

[Ace]

I'm still trying to figure the title of this chain... is it supposed to mean "I wonder what Tuna, Meant, on Monday night in switching quarterbacks.."?   Ton of mints?

Anyway, We In Southern Michiana a.k.a. Indianana do not play Paper Scissors Rock or other sissy games, and I personally would spit out the entire cherry since I cannot stand the taste of the things.

I guess you could do Wine and Cheese parties, in the UK Buff.  Enough Merlot and you could go quite a ways.  Of course, with you it'd be jet propelled.

Ace; we play Fingers Hand Fist.

[Bill]

I think guests would react poorly if I showed up at a Wine and Cheese party in the buff.  Bad taste, you know.

Bill; bad enough fully clothed.

[pat]

Walk, don?t run with those scissors.

I think it means you can tune a piano, but you can?t tune a fish.

Brahahahahahahahah???????

[Whizbang]

OOoooh boy.  I guess I should have typed Toinament.  At least that would suit anyone from Nyew Yawk.   ::)

I just decided that I will correct the title.  That way only the previous replies will look stupid.   ;D

[pat]

Well, I bet if you closed your eyes we wouldn?t be able to see you either.

[Whizbang]

Sorry, but I can't close my eyes for awhile yet, practicing for the big tounament in Hot Springs, ya know.  Actually, to most Arkies, that would be Hawt Sprangs.

[Ace]

"Ooh boy oh boy, Whiz is gonna make us look stupid.  Watch out.."  
Hey, take your best shot.  I don't need ANYBODY to make me look stupid, dangit.

And you guys with your weird Arkie and British and Michigan accents; I'm glad I don't have one.  I think playing paperscissrock with your eyes closed might be fun, although it wouldn't make much sense.  Probably right up there with playing that "20 questions" game in a nursing home with Alzheimer's patients...

"Is it blue..?"
No.
"Is it blue?"
No...

You know, Whiz, you have to WIN the title before you can correct it.  But I think if you keep practicing you have as good a shot as anybody.  Heck, playing Arkansansans there's a chance your opponent could be defaulted by playing his toes, too.

ace; I may be dumb but I'm not stupid.

[pat]

What?s blue? Nothing but grey as far as I can see.
bluwho

And quit making fun of my accent, us up here in Northern Michiana have the clearest sounding American you could hear, ya hear. It?s almost musical.

None of that Southern drawl like from those Southern Michianians. It?s like trying to understand a tech support tech from some other place in some other language other than the one you?re used to. Get it.

[Ace]

Oh, knock it off.  You are not in "Northern Michigan."  You're in middle Michigan, maybe.  

Northern Michigan is further north than Canada, for the most part.  Nearly to Russia.  It's probably colder than Colorado at this time of year.  There's Mackinaw Island and Mackinac City, and I have no idea why they're spelled differently.  And pronounced wrong, like Gloucestshire or Worceshestire or wherever it was they roll cheese.

I don't want to put words in Whiz or Buff's mouths since I probably couldn't understand them, anyway.

Ace; it's a balmy 46 degrees here and time for a margarita on the patio.

[Bill]

Geez. 3:30 and you're drinking already.  Must be 5:00 somewhere.  I think I'll join you, well not literally, I don't like "balmy 46 degrees."

Bill: from southern SC.

[pat]

Ah, but not to cold to cook outside on the bar-b. I?m just fixing to bring in a nice butt portion of ham that?s been a grilling.

I going to roll that thing right on to the table and get at it.

AHHHH another poast turned to food??????

[Ace]

"butt portion of ham.."  Where the heck else is a ham, but there?

"I believe the Jester has a head portion of ham, under his dingly cap."  As if.

Ace; we had tacos.  We did not grill them.